Knights in Black and White
by Spunky0ne
Summary: After the fall of the quincy king, Ichigo struggles as he tries to resume a normal life. But beneath his flesh is a monster…one that threatens everything and everyone he loves. As he teeters on the precipice, one person hears his lonely cries for help and tries to answer…yaoi, **non-con/rape (non-graphic)**, mpreg, angst…Byakuya/Ichigo, Kurushimi/Tetsuya, Renji/Rukia
1. Invasion of the Soul

**Knights in Black and White**

 **By Spunky0ne**

 **XXXXXXXXXX**

 **(A request by Ashesofthefirststar. Lol, this may be a case of 'be careful what you wish for, because your wish really might come true." Warning…this is a darker storyline, although, I promise a very satisfying ending. After the fall of the quincy king, Ichigo struggles within himself as he tries to resume a normal life. But beneath his flesh is a monster…one that threatens everything and everyone he loves. As he teeters on the precipice, one person hears his lonely cries for help and tries to answer…yaoi, **non-con/rape (non-graphic)**, mpreg, angst…Byakuya/Ichigo, Kurushimi/Tetsuya, Renji/Rukia, Uryu/Orihime, Aderia/Ogano. Shimas Kurushimi, Aderia, and Magdelina appear courtesy of Shima-Taicho31)**

 **XXXXXXXXXX**

 **Chapter 1: Invasion of the Soul**

Kurosaki Ichigo shivered and moaned restlessly in his sleep, his mind creeping back to the icy palace in the skies above Soul Society.

 _Ywach's hand clenched at his clothing, the sharp nails raking across his heaving chest, leaving bright red trails that oozed drops of his blood. The coppery scent filled his senses and a scream of pain and horror escaped him as the quincy king's face came closer, his mustached lips curling back into a cruel smile._

" _Do you finally understand?" Ywach hissed wickedly, "No matter what power you bring to the battlefield, I will travel into the future and I will break it! No matter what you do, you can't win, Ichigo. Your powers, your life, your very soul belongs to me. And you are going to learn now just what that means!"_

" _You bastard!" Ichigo howled, struggling as the quincy king's power swelled and encircled them, "You won't win! I won't let you. I don't know what I can do, but I will defeat you!"_

" _There is nothing more that you can do," Ywach answered icily, shoving him down onto his back and leaning over him, "That power in you belongs to me, and I am taking it back."_

 _Another wrenching scream escaped Ichigo as he felt ice cold fingers touch the place on his abdomen, just above his spirit core. He turned his head and his desperate eyes found Orihime's collapsed body, lying a short distance away._

" _She can't help you," Ywach said with chilling calm, "Your friends and allies can't help you. No one can help you, Ichigo. But…I am a benevolent king. I will take your power, but I will leave something too."_

 _Ichigo's body twisted wildly beneath Ywach's and his reiatsu poured out around him, trying desperately to push the attacking king away from him. But the quincy king only laughed as he sucked in the freed power and quickly made it his own. Ichigo closed his eyes against the sight of Ywach's madly grinning face and tried not to feel the rending of his clothing or the viciousness of the physical attack that followed._

 _He tried to escape his ravaged body, to see the smiling faces of his mother, father and sisters, to see Karakura Town, looking as peaceful and tranquil as always, to scent the pleasant aromas of fall, the light, misted air, smoke from fireplaces. And instead of Ywach's evil laughter, he tried to hear the sounds of his friends' voices, birdsong, and light sounds of breezes through the trees._

 _He wasn't sure how long the torment of his body continued. He was only aware when it stopped and he felt Ywach's eyes raking over his bruised and bloodied form. A ragged sigh of deep satisfaction escaped the quincy king and his lips smiled again as he heard fast flash steps approaching. On the debris strewn floor of the throne room, Ichigo gasped and panted in distress, his hands moving quickly to hide what had been done to him. He managed to lift himself onto his knees as Rukia and Renji burst into the room, prompting haughty laughter and a final threat from the departing quincy king as he opened a portal back into the Seireitei._

" _Follow me, if you dare. But know that if you do, I will find that happiest place in your future, and it is there that I will slaughter you."_

"Ichigo," a solemn male voice called softly, bringing the shinigami substitute suddenly awake.

Ichigo sat up quickly, his golden brown eyes red, damp and haunted as they found Byakuya sitting at his bedside and looking down at him with a concerned expression.

"B-byakuya?" Ichigo managed shakily.

"You were crying out in your sleep," Byakuya explained.

"Should I bring a healer, sir?" Byakuya's attendant asked from the doorway.

"I'm okay," Ichigo said, shaking his head firmly, "I just…"

"Please leave us, Torio," Byakuya said quietly.

"Of course, sir."

Byakuya studied Ichigo's pale face and still spooked expression.

"Are you sure that you do not wish to have the healer come and visit you?" the noble asked, "Your reiatsu seems very unsettled."

"I…I uh…" Ichigo stammered, looking around the room and recognizing the dark cherry wood furniture and what had been the lovely Kuchiki gardens outside, "Are we…? Is this your home, Byakuya?"

"It is," Byakuya answered, blinking slowly, "I apologize for the state of things, but…"

"Don't be silly," Ichigo said, recovering a little smile as he took a deeper breath and looked around, "We're lucky that anything survived what happened here."

"We are," the noble agreed.

Ichigo noticed suddenly the slightly rumpled nightclothes Byakuya wore, his tumbled black hair and tired eyes.

"Sorry," he apologized, "I woke you up."

"It's fine," Byakuya assured him, "I do not think anyone is sleeping very well tonight. Too much has happened."

"Y-yeah," Ichigo agreed, looking down at his hands.

"Would you like one of your friends to come and sit with you?" Byakuya asked, "Inoue Orihime and Renji are still unconscious, but Rukia, Ishida Uryu and your friend, Sado, are all nearby and well enough."

"No," Ichigo answered, leaning back against his pillows and closing his eyes, "I just need to sleep."

"Sleep will certainly help," Byakuya replied approvingly, "But…perhaps when you wake, you will want to speak with Shima Aderia. She healed you after the battle, and she said that she recommended therapy sessions with her as soon as you felt able."

"Why?" Ichigo asked sharply, "I'm fine. I'll be fine. I just need rest and food. My injuries aren't that bad."

Byakuya gave him a measured look and then nodded in acquiescence.

"I will leave you to your rest then," he said, rising and turning away, "If you need anything, my attendant will be nearby and Tetsuya is on guard duty. Goodnight, Kurosaki Ichigo."

"Goodnight Byakuya, and…thanks…for everything."

Ichigo felt a little jolt inside at the look of mingled sadness and genuine gratitude Byakuya gave him.

"It was nothing compared to what you did for the sake of Soul Society. We are the ones who should be thankful to you. You saved all of us."

Byakuya left the room and started back towards his own, but was stopped a moment later as Shima Aderia stepped into the hallway.

"Is there a problem, Kuchiki taichou?" she asked, blinking sleepily, "I heard raised voices."

"Ichigo was having more nightmares," Byakuya reported, "I asked if he wanted you to come, but he said that he prefers to sleep."

"Ah," Aderia sighed, looking worriedly in the direction of Ichigo's room, "Sadly, that is not surprising after what he's been through. He is used to being there for other people and he is very private with his troubles."

Byakuya observed the pretty, caramel skinned healer, his dark eyes contemplative.

"Aderia," he said softly after a few moments, "you know what I discovered when I found Ichigo in the wreckage of his battle with Ywach. He wasn't just injured from the fighting. It was clear that he was raped."

"Yes," Aderia agreed, "And I took the evidence that you provided and healed him fully. I did a full scan of his body and cleared it of foreign reiatsu."

"But healing his body is not enough," Byakuya argued, "I am sure that this is part of what is troubling him. When I entered his bedroom, I found him lying in a suggestive position and looking as though he was struggling with someone."

"I understand," Aderia said reassuringly, "and I have every intention of attempting to convince Ichigo to allow me to counsel him. But it must be his choice. I can't help him, no one can…unless he chooses that path."

Aderia smiled sadly and placed a hand on Byakuya's shoulder.

"I know that you concern yourself greatly with Ichigo's well-being. He is lucky to have a friend like you."

"But I am not really…"

Aderia chuckled in amusement.

"You may have just been a comrade before," she commented, "but the care that you took with him before we arrived and the concern you are showing for him now, make you something more than that, I think. Please try not to worry, Kuchiki taichou. I will encourage Ichigo to accept counseling."

"Very well. Thank you, Shima Aderia."

Byakuya started towards his room, then turned and looked back at her again.

"I am sorry," he apologized, "I was very focused on Ichigo and I neglected to ask if your brother has been located yet."

Aderia's eyes darkened with worry.

"No, he is still missing. _Mamà_ is sure that she saw him being dragged away as she lost consciousness after Shima Adobe was attacked. We did not feel his death, and he was not found with the prisoners that the quincy forces slaughtered in revenge for their king's death. He may have escaped them. We don't know."

Byakuya's grey eyes reflected genuine sympathy.

"I hope that he returns home safely to you soon."

"Thank you, Kuchiki taichou."

XXXXXXXXXX

Kuchiki Tetsuya's lips frowned and his dark sapphire eyes looked out into the pouring rain as lightning flashed, illuminating the heavily damaged grounds.

 _Something doesn't feel quite right out there._

He moved easily in the darkness along the wooden walkway, alongside the partially collapsed main wing of the estate, stopping as he reached one of the house guards under his command.

"Tsutomu," he greeted the guard.

"Sir?"

"Have you sensed anything unusual?"

"No sir," the guard reported, "Except for the thunder and lightning, everything is quiet."

"The storm is going to make it difficult to see or sense an incoming attack," Tetsuya commented, "Inform me immediately if you sense anything out of the ordinary at all."

"Yes sir!"

Tetsuya left the walkway and stepped out into the steadily falling rain, his sharp senses piqued as he headed across the gardens and left through the broken back gates. He paused on the meandering forest path, his frown deepening as he sensed a flickering reiatsu.

 _Master?_

Tetsuya startled at the sound of his stallion familiar's voice as it sounded in his mind, and the tall, black Arabian appeared in front of him.

"Arashi!" Tetsuya scolded the beast, "I might've attacked you. I usually sense when you're this close to me, but there is something malevolent in this storm. It feels as though it dampens our senses. It is similar to what we felt when the quincies first attacked, although on a lesser level. Still, it may be that the remaining rebel quincies are using this to continue to set up attacks on us."

 _I will remain on watch out here_ , Arashi offered, _Using our waterforms, we can avoid the eyes of any incoming attackers and warn the household._

Tetsuya nodded and implemented his shikai, causing his own body to fade as his stallion did the same.

"Stay here and watch over the household," Tetsuya instructed his equine counterpart, "I am going to investigate a disturbance I felt out this way."

 _Should I go with you?_

"No. Please remain here and protect Byakuya-sama and the others. I will be back."

 _Be careful, Master._

"I will," Tetsuya promised.

Tetsuya flash stepped away, heading down the soggy trail that led through a thick stand of trees, then to the top of a cliff that was dotted with lovely sakura trees. A river ran along one edge of the trees, cascading down into a large lake beneath the cliff. Tetsuya walked along the edge of the water, then out into the trees, scanning the area carefully.

 _This is a good place for either an ambush or from which to launch an attack on Kuchiki Manor._

He paused at the edge of the cliff, watching in silence as lightning flashed, lighting up the lake and meadow below him, and making the waterform he inhabited glow for a moment. A staggering step sounded behind Tetsuya and he spun around, reeling as a tall, badly bleeding man crashed into him, sending both tumbling over the edge of the cliff.

 _He must have seen me when the lightning lit my waterform!_ Tetsuya realized.

He employed his flash step immediately, recalling a safe landing place that should have been within reach. To his surprise, the bloodied man hung on tightly to him, dragging him down and sending both crashing down into the lake. Instinctively, Tetsuya used his innate ability to breathe underwater. The man hanging onto him thrashed and struggled wildly, trying to reach the surface, but obviously confused by the pitch blackness beneath the water's surface. Tetsuya's hand found the man's face and he willed his ability to extend to the other.

 _Breathe,_ his voice whispered into the other man's mind, _You can breathe under the water now._

The man holding onto him stiffened, then seemed to realize he was no longer drowning. His grip on Tetsuya loosened and he moved easily with the blue-eyed noble as Tetsuya guided him to the surface of the water, then to the shore. The two men crawled out of the water and collapsed on the bank of the lake, panting harshly and coughing the water out of their lungs.

When he had recovered enough, Tetsuya employed a kido light and rolled the other man onto his back. He was immediately stricken by the man's handsome caramel colored skin and turquoise eyes.

"Are you injured?" Tetsuya asked, shifting his body to shield the injured man from the rain.

The man nodded and groaned fitfully.

Biting gently at his lip, Tetsuya peeled back the folds of the man's top, revealing his muscular chest that was marked with two deep slashes.

"Hold still," he instructed the man.

The man nodded again, flinching as Tetsuya laid icy hands on him and invoked a healing kido.

"Can you tell me your name?"

"First, you tell me yours, _angelito_ ," the man said, smiling up at him dazedly.

"Are you from the Shima clan?" Tetsuya asked, "They have your coloring and the same sort of accent."

" _Sì_ , you are right about that, _angelito_. I am Shima Kurushimi."

Tetsuya's eyes widened.

"Shima Kurushimi?" he repeated, "You are the Shima leader? Aderia-san's brother who was missing?"

"Th-the same," Kurushimi assured him, "You may call me Kuri-kuri. And please tell me what cloud you fell off of."

Tetsuya blushed.

"I was on duty and sensed what must have been your reiatsu."

"Ah," Kuri said dizzily, "Then, you are my…guardian angel?"

Tetsuya looked back at him blankly.

"Um…"

"You are an angel, aren't you, lovely one? I saw you in your angel form, just before I fell and you caught me and helped me breathe under the water."

"Oh that!" Tetsuya laughed, his shyness leaving him as the humor of the situation overtook him, "That was a waterform, Shima-sama. That is my power. I am not an angel."

"Then you are a pretty devil, come to suck my life away?" Kuri asked weakly.

"I am a shinigami," Tetsuya corrected him, touching a hand to his face to set a pain block.

Tetsuya froze, staring in surprise as Kuri's hand captured his, and he brought it to his lips and kissed it gently.

"What is your name, _angelito_?"

"I told you, I am not…"

"What is your n-name…?" Kuri said, trailing off as the pain block took effect and he began to drift off.

"I am Tetsuya," the noble told him, "Kuchiki Tetsuya."


	2. Hero

**Chapter 2: Hero**

 **(My gratitude to Winterheart2000 (Aww, thanks, I will!), Lovebot1575 (You've got it!), Jaundrie (So glad you like it! And here's more to love.), Adalie Delacroix (Yeah, Ichigo is always trying to be strong for other people, so he doesn't like his own weakness. Hence, his suffering when he lost his powers. He seems aware that he doesn't handle emotional stuff and powerlessness or weakness well. Byakuya has his work cut out for him, that's for sure. As for Kuri, he's never too far gone to make Tetsuya blush! Those two are a hoot to write together.), Enjali (LOL, you think you hate Ywach now...), Hisuiryuu (Aww, I'm flattered!), GrimmIchisgrl (Thanks so much! I will be sure to give you a great story!), GentleDjinn (So glad you like it!), and Aizenfan6969 (Sure thing! This one's front burner.) Enjoy the new chapter!)**

Ichigo gazed sightlessly down at the food tray that rested in his lap, taking little bites and sipping disinterestedly at his tea, while outside his guest room, sounds of builders' voices mingled with footsteps on the wooden walkway and intermittent splashing of koi in the nearby pond. He looked up as the youthful attendant assigned to watch over him stepped into the room and took on a worried look as he observed how little the shinigami substitute had eaten.

"Kurosaki-sama, are you feeling all right?" the teen boy inquired, "Do you need to see a healer, sir?"

"No, Akio," he assured the concerned attendant, "I'm okay, really. I'm just not very hungry, I guess. It's good, though. Please thank Matsuko-san for me."

"Ah, I will," Akio promised, "Do you need anything else, sir?"

"No, I'm good."

Akio nodded.

"I will be back in a little while, when it is time to dress for the ceremony."

"Right," Ichigo sighed, "okay."

He watched as his attendant left the room, then went back to staring at his tray, his mind pondering.

 _It doesn't feel like a week has passed since Ywach was defeated and the war ended. Of course, I've barely left my room, so…I guess it's to be expected._

Ichigo set the tray aside and pulled the covers back, thinking to take a short walk, but he paused as voices sounded outside his door.

"Hey Akio," Rukia greeted his attendant cheerfully, "Is Ichigo up yet?"

"Ah, he is," Akio confirmed, "But, he is occupied right now and not seeing any visitors."

"Again," Rukia sighed.

"It's all right," Orihime said cheerfully, "We'll just talk to him after the ceremony."

"Ichigo's…all right, isn't he?" Uryu asked, "I mean, he usually would want more company."

"Kurosaki-sama is recovering well," Akio assured the quincy youth, "He is just very busy with preparations. He is receiving the Seireitei's highest honor today."

"Right," Uryu said uneasily.

"We should go and get ready, ourselves," Sado suggested.

Ichigo listened to the fading footsteps of his friends, his heart aching.

 _I don't know what's wrong with me. I want to talk to them. I want to see them. I just…I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't know why everything around me seems so far away, so unreal. I just don't feel like myself anymore. I don't know. Maybe I'm just really different because of the war._

Ichigo shivered inwardly and wrapped his arms around himself as he remembered Ywach's assault that had seemed to penetrate every part of him, body, mind and heart.

 _I was a different person before that battle. I was so sure I was just going to walk in there and beat him. I was just a stupid kid._

 _I was a virgin._

Ichigo's heart skipped painfully at the thought, and he closed his eyes as his mind was raked with the memory of his violent deflowering.

 _It's strange._

 _I was never that interested in anyone that way. I know Orihime likes me…maybe loves me. But I just see her like I see all of my friends. I can't see her in a sexual way. I can't see anyone that way._

 _Especially not now._

 _I never want to be touched like that again. I mean, I know that Ywach was an enemy, and I even know that what he did to me wasn't really a sexual thing. He was just dominating me, making me feel inferior. But ever since, I hate it when people touch me. Even when the healers touch me, I get this creepy feeling on my skin. My heart pounds. I feel sick inside. Maybe I'm afraid that if people touch me, they'll know. They'll see that I've changed. They don't want me to change. They want back the person I was. I want that person back._

 _I…don't know what to do._

He leaned forward, burying his face in his hands, unaware that Byakuya had appeared in the inner doorway to his room. The noble stood for a moment, knowing he should say something and aching inwardly because he couldn't think of a thing to say. He took a slow breath, guilt stabbing at his insides as he found himself unable to act, then he turned and quietly walked back down the hallway.

XXXXXXXXXX

" _Buenos dìàs_ , Magdelina-san," Tetsuya greeted the Shima matriarch, who sat quietly at her injured son's side.

" _Buenos dìas_ , _angelito_ ," the Shima matriarch answered, smiling warmly as Tetsuya set a tray of food and tea in her lap and took a seat beside her.

"Has Kuri-kuri-sama shown any signs of waking today?" he asked.

"Not yet," Magdelina said patiently, "but he will wake soon. He is just taking his time."

Tetsuya gave a little worried sigh.

"He's been unconscious since I brought him here, six days ago. I was able to speak to him a little, but he didn't tell me what happened or how he reached Kuchiki Manor."

"Oh, I am sure he will tell us everything after he wakes up," Magdelina assured him, taking Kuri's limp hand in hers and caressing it gently, "I'm sure it was quite an adventure."

"The enemy was very brutal with him," Tetsuya said sadly, "I did everything I could."

Magdelina gave him a warm smile and patted his face gently.

"You saved my son's life, _angelito_ ," she said gratefully, "He was able to tell us that."

"Oh," Tetsuya said, blushing, "I…it was just battlefield healing. Basic first aid."

"But you saved him, just the same," Magdelina insisted, "My Aderia told me it was so. And you have come every day to see how he is and to keep me company."

"You are his mother," Tetsuya said, pausing briefly as a memory of his own late mother flashed in his mind, "I know you worry about him."

"Yes, we do worry about our children," Magdelina agreed, brushing several dark strands of hair away from her face, "but I know my son is strong. He will wake up soon. And I want to ask you something about when he does."

Tetsuya looked back at Magdelina curiously.

"I have heard that you are one of the Breeder males from an ancestor who survived the purge after the Seireitei's recovery from the first war with the quincies."

"Yes," Tetsuya answered, coloring slightly, "It was passed to me through my father, Kuchiki Takao, although he never admitted publicly to having the ability. But it was discovered while we were incarcerated at Itamigiri, and it was one of the two charges that led to his execution. I was only spared the same fate because the ability does not present until puberty, and then it is usually discovered when a Breeder male first conceives. My ability was discovered when I became pregnant by my cellmate. I was sentenced to death as well, but Byakuya-sama arrived at the prison and freed us."

"But the father of the child…?"

"He died protecting me as we fled the prison," Tetsuya explained, "and the child I carried was lost because of my poor health and injuries I received as I escaped the prison."

"¡ _Dios mío_!" Magdelina exclaimed softly, "You poor thing."

The Shima matriarch thought for a moment.

" _Angelito_ , did you know that my Kuri also lost his husband and child?" she asked.

"Yes, I heard about Hideaki-sama's passing several years ago," Tetsuya answered, thinking back.

"Hideaki was a commoner, but he had some noble blood as well. And he was a Breeder male also."

"They met sort of by accident," Tetsuya remembered, "when Kuri-kuri-sama was passing through a Rukongai town and Hideaki-sama started to fall from a ladder. Kuri-kuri-sama caught Hideaki-sama in his arms and it was love at first sight."

"They did fall in love very quickly," Magdelina confirmed, "and it was enough that Kuri defied the will of the elders and revoked his promise to marry your cousin, Sasune."

"Sasune was furious!" Tetsuya recalled, "He swore vengeance, although our elders would not allow his subfamily to declare open war on your family. I was glad that Kuri-kuri-sama really fell in love with someone. That is how it should be."

"Yes, it is," Magdelina agreed, "But what I wanted to share with you is that love does not always happen before people are married."

Tetsuya looked back at the elder woman questioningly.

"Many of the noble marriages that take place are arranged, often to make alliances or for other reasons."

"Yes," Tetsuya agreed, "I know this."

"Sometimes, there are even nobler reasons for marrying two people before they fall in love."

Tetsuya looked back at Magdelina with a confused expression.

"I am not sure I follow you, Magdelina-sama," he said uncertainly.

"Tetsuya-san," she said affectionately, taking his hand in hers, "sometimes it is sensed that certain souls share a powerful resonance…that they have met for a reason."

"And you think this about Kuri-kuri-sama and me?" Tetsuya asked curiously, "Why?"

"I saw the way Kuri looked at you when you arrived and we began to treat his injuries."

"Oh, you shouldn't mind that," Tetsuya laughed, "Kuri-kuri-sama was dizzy from loss of blood. He wasn't making sense."

"But he was, in one way," Magdelina insisted, her dark eyes capturing Tetsuya's meaningfully, "Kuri has never so much as looked at another person with those eyes he touched you with, _angelito._ And even though it may be an infatuation for now, or loss of blood, the resonance that formed between you was no mistake."

Tetsuya's heart quickened and he laid a bracing hand over it to calm himself.

"What are you asking me, Magdelina-sama?" he inquired, "Are you saying that you want me to marry Kuri-kuri-sama? He isn't even awake! He barely knows me, and he never said he wanted such a thing. Why would you…?"

"My son has been in mourning," the Shima matriarch explained sadly, "crying every night for the past twenty years. For just a moment, the heaviness went out of his eyes, Tetsuya-san…and that happened, when he looked at you."

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji shifted anxiously as he stood, naked, in front of a mirror, muttering furiously and wearing a flustered expression.

"Ah…Taichou, I uh...no, Taichou, can I…? Taichou, I need to…augh, no!" he snapped, stamping a bare foot, then quickly composing himself, "Taichou, can I talk to you about something?"

"Of course, Renji," Byakuya answered as he passed through the redhead's guest room door, followed by Renji's assigned attendant.

Renji let out a surprised yelp and dashed behind the full length mirror, his bright red face peeking out at the noble.

"What are you doing? You scared me to death!" he cried, "And I'm naked!"

"Oh, come now, Abarai, we have seen each other naked. I had important information to pass on that…"

"Okay, fine, sorry," Renji said, swallowing hard and taking a steadying breath as he straightened, "Sorry, Taichou. What is it?"

"Come out from behind that mirror, Renji," Byakuya insisted, "This is important."

Renji cleared his throat anxiously and emerged from behind the mirror, then quickly snatched his yukata and wrapped it around himself as his attendant began to prepare his fresh uniform.

"What is it, Taichou?"

Byakuya looked back at him curiously.

"It will wait for a moment," he said calmly, "Why don't you tell me what you were wanting to say before?"

"Wh-what I wanted to say?" Renji asked, breaking out in a sweat, "Oh…uh, it wasn't anything important."

"That is not how it sounded," Byakuya said skeptically, "In fact, it sounded very important. We should speak about that first."

"W-well," Renji stammered, his blush deepening, "See, the truth is I…Taichou, I…see, Rukia and I have known each other since we were kids."

"I know that," Byakuya said with a very slight edge of sarcasm, "and I know as well that I was the reason that the two of you went for forty years without speaking. That was actually why I came to speak to you."

"Oh, well, you know, we've worked that out," Renji said easily, "I'm not holding a grudge or anything."

"But…there is something that still troubles you," Byakuya said, leading him.

"Y-yeah!" Renji exclaimed, nodding, "I…"

"You…very much appreciate the renewed friendship that you have with my sister," Byakuya supplied.

"Right! Really," Renji agreed enthusiastically, "I do. But um…I…that is, we…"

"You…wish for something more profound?" Byakuya asked, yielding the ghost of a smile.

"Uh-huh," Renji admitted, closing his eyes tightly and going breathless at the admission.

He suffered several tense moments with his eyes closed and fully expecting something horrible to happen to him. When it didn't, he cracked his eyes open and found Byakuya giving him an amused look.

"T-taichou?" he inquired weakly.

"Well," Byakuya said, wresting control of the conversation away from his distressed fukutaichou again, "it seems that there is only one thing to do to make sure that your association with Rukia is never again tampered with."

"Huh?" Renji mused, blinking.

"I came to tell you that, given the fact that you have earned such an honorable place in the Gotei 13, and you have been Rukia's friend for so long, I would like to arrange a marriage between you and my sister," Byakuya said, smirking as Renji swayed slightly on his feet and let out a relieved laugh.

"Oh my god, Taichou, you knew all along, didn't you?" the redhead accused him shakily.

"Rukia came to me and confessed that she is in love with you. She has been for a while. She was worried that you would never get up the nerve to ask before I chose someone else for her…"

"Yeah," Renji sighed, shaking his head, "Guilty as charged. But, I was trying."

"I know."

Renji laughed and let his yukata drop to the floor as his attendant moved closer to begin dressing him.

"That was mean, Taichou," he snickered, "You almost gave me a heart attack!"

"It will be interesting to see how you handle a noble wedding," Byakuya teased him.

"Oh my god!" Renji giggled, clutching at his chest, "Can't we just elope?"

"Rukia is a member of the greatest noble clan," Byakuya said proudly, "You will have a formal, family wedding."

"Okay, whatever you say, Taichou."

Renji froze as Byakuya offered him a genuine smile.

"We are going to be Brother-in-law, Renji," the noble chided him, "You may call me Byakuya…except in formal occasions, of course."

"Of course," Renji repeated, still with an edge of anxiety, "Thank you, Taichou…I mean, _Byakuya_."

Byakuya nodded approvingly.

"You are welcome, Renji."

XXXXXXXXXX

" _Follow me, if you dare. But know that if you do, I will find that happiest place in your future, and it is there that I will slaughter you."_

"N-no!" Ichigo moaned, turning in his sleep.

" _Follow me, if you dare. But know that if you do, I will find that happiest place in your future, and it is there that I will slaughter you."_

Ichigo jumped awake as his attendant touched him gently to wake him.

"No!" he cried out, sucking in a surprised breath as he realized what he had done.

"I am…so sorry, Kurosaki-sama!" Akio apologized, "I was worried and…and it is time to dress for the ceremony."

"R-right, it's okay," Ichigo said, forcing a smile, "I'm glad you woke me up. I was having a really bad nightmare."

Akio gave him a bracing smile.

"Maybe it will be good to get out of this room for awhile," he offered.

"Well, I could do without the big crowds," Ichigo sighed, "but I guess it's important for people to see me."

"It is," Akio agreed, "Kurosaki-sama is the Seireitei's hero. You saved us all when you defeated Ywach. Naturally, everyone wants to show you their gratitude."

Ichigo shook his head dismissively as he exited the bed and walked to the dressing area.

"They don't need to do that. I'm not…I mean, I just didn't want everyone to die. Everyone who was out there was fighting for that same thing. Just because I struck the last blow…"

"But, don't you understand?" Akio asked, frowning, "No one else could defeat Ywach. Just you, Kurosaki-sama. And that is why you are being honored."

"But there were a lot of people who helped me, so that I could be there to do that."

"And they are being honored too," Akio assured him, "Urahara-san, Shihoin Yoruichi, Abarai Renji and the taichous. Central 46 knows. They are honoring all of you."

Ichigo looked at his too think reflection in the mirror for a moment.

"Do you know what's happening to Aizen Sousuke?" he asked quietly.

Akio started to answer, then noticed his brother, Torio, standing respectfully by the inner doorway.

"Torio?" he inquired.

"Byakuya-sama would like to speak to Kurosaki-sama before they leave for the meeting. He can do so now or wait for Kurosaki-sama to finish dressing."

"Uh, tell Byakuya I will be done in a few minutes. I'll…um…"

"You can meet him in his study," Torio offered, "I will inform him, Kurosaki-sama."

 _Maybe it's stupid,_ Ichigo thought, looking at his thin, undernourished body again, _But I don't want Byakuya or anyone else to see me like this. I'll be glad when I go home to Karakura Town and there aren't any attendants anymore._

 _I'll be glad when I can just be me again._


	3. Invisible Wounds

**Chapter 3: Invisible Wounds**

 **XXXXXXXXXX**

 **(Thanks going out to Ashesofthefirststar, who is another big Bya/Ichi lover like me and has some fanfics you'll want to check out! (Ichigo is in for some jaw dropping, scream inducing, no holds barred terror as he realizes just what Ywach has done. But will he be able to stop the terror train, once it is in motion? **spoilers**That train has already left the station...), Tomyallen (And here's another chapter to keep you nomming! Ichigo will face some heartbreaking moments as he realizes, like you said, that there is no going back. Moving forward is hard...and even harder with a devil like Ywach mucking up your life. Tetsuya is in for a whirlwind styled romance with the very smitten Kuri and Renji will probably blush and stumble all of the way to the altar. But hanging over everything is that dark cloud called Ywach.), Adalie Delacroix (Byakuya not only knows what happened to Ichigo, he has a lot of insight into having to hide emotion while breaking up inside. He is exactly what Ichigo needs, and he will find himself unable to let Ichigo crash down completely. Kuri will have an interesting reaction to his mother's well-intentioned meddling and will probably leave Tetsuya with a permanent blush before long!), Hisuiryuu (I adore Renji's sometimes brash, but easy to fluster personality! And Byakuya's deadpan humor, which often flies right over Renji's red head is a delight to play with. Ah, Kuri's interest in Tetsuya is playful right now. We'll see what happens when Magdelina broaches the subject of marriage. And Byakuya has some wise words to Ichigo that will lay a foundation for things to come.), Enjali (The truth of what Ywach has done to Ichigo is pretty heinous...and Ichigo's attempts to hide his pain are going to play right into that wicked guy's hands.), Yukino76 (Yeah, the muse is pummeling me! Help? lol), GrimmIchisgrl (Ichigo's going to need a lot of cuddling and probably Byakuya's fighting skill before this is over!), Wildwind13 (Wish granted!), PrivateCaller (So glad you love it! I will have yet another chapter along very soon.) and Lovebot1575 (I am already into the next, so the wait will be short.) Happy Friday! Love to all, Spunky)**

 **XXXXXXXXXX**

 _None of this feels real,_ Ichigo mused, forcing a smile as he looked out over the shinigamis gathered in his honor, _I feel like I'm in a movie. It seems like the colors are faded and the voices seem far away._

He was careful to attend enough so that he knew when to move forward to accept the hand of the Central 46 grand councilor, then that of the Gotei 13 Soutaichou. He took slow breaths, holding his lips in an upward curve as the people in front of him clapped wildly and shouted his name. Grateful for the assistance Byakuya's staff had given him to prepare, he launched into the speech that he had been helped to write out and learn, pausing at times to allow for the audience in front of him to clap or shout in response. He gave a relieved inward sigh as he reached the end of his speech and returned to his place, standing beside Byakuya in front of the group being honored.

As the speeches went on in front of him, he started to feel flushed and warm. Sweat broke out on his forehead and he shivered uncomfortably. Next to him, Byakuya shifted slightly and breathed a few words too quiet for anyone else to hear.

"Are you all right?" he asked in a whisper, "You look ill."

"I can do it," Ichigo said dizzily, trying to ignore the rising buzz in his ears.

"Ichigo," Byakuya whispered warningly as the Shingami substitute began to sway.

Ichigo tried to take calming breaths, but the buzzing in his ears grew louder and slowly, his vision began to darken. He felt his legs give way and heard Byakuya make a sound of dismay. The pleasant scent of sakura drifted comfortingly over his senses and he felt strong arms catch him as he collapsed. He heard Byakuya's voice again, but the words were garbled. Everything disappeared for a while into a hazy grey that reminded him of Byakuya's deep, calm eyes.

 _What is everyone going to think?_

 _I'll just blame it on not eating enough…being too tired…injuries from the battles. Maybe it is one of those things. I haven't been eating or sleeping well. I was hurt. I'm sure everyone will understand. They just needed the ceremony to bring people up after how difficult the war was and how many people died. I shouldn't be thinking about my troubles. I should be happy that my friends and I all came back alive and that we'll be going home soon._

 _I should sign up for the community college when I get home to Karakura Town. I did pretty well in high school, but there wasn't time, with everything going on for me to apply to colleges. I have to start thinking about what I want to be._

 _I have no idea._

Ichigo sank down into the comforting darkness, letting mind and body drift aimlessly for what seemed like hours. When he woke again, it was late at night and he was back in his guest room at Kuchiki Manor. Out of the corner of one eye, he could see that someone was sitting at his bedside.

"Oh," he said sleepily, "Akio, you don't have to…"

"It is me," Byakuya's voice said, startling him into full wakefulness, "I was…concerned after you collapsed into my arms. Are you feeling any better?"

"Y-yeah," Ichigo said, taking a deeper breath and sitting up, "Sorry about worrying you…and everyone. I was out for a while, huh?"

"You were unconscious for several hours, then you fell asleep and have been resting for several more. There is warm tea and some food. Do you think you can manage something? I had Torio prepare soothing foods that should not upset your stomach."

"I'll try," Ichigo assured him.

Byakuya picked up one of the teacups from the tray and sipped at it quietly, while Ichigo nibbled on several crackers and worked at his own cup of tea.

"Thanks," he said gratefully, "Thanks for everything, Byakuya. I'm sorry I've been so much trouble."

"You've been no trouble," Byakuya said firmly, "It is expected that after all that you suffered during the late stages of the war, you would need sufficient time to recover fully."

Ichigo felt a little jolt in his midsection.

 _Does Byakuya…know?_

" _Does he know that Ywach raped me?_

"You are welcome to continue your recuperation here at Kuchiki Manor for as long as you need. Akio is at your disposal."

Ichigo let out a soft, distressed breath and sat up straighter.

"Ah, thanks, Byakuya. But I…think I'll be going home to Karakura Town tomorrow."

Byakuya gave him a look of surprise.

"You are not ready for such a trip yet," he insisted, "You really should wait until you have healed more fully and have normal reiatsu levels."

"I know I'm not in the best shape," Ichigo agreed, "But I think going home will help me to relax and heal faster. I can have Tetsuya take me back on Arashi, maybe. That way, it's less stress on my body."

Byakuya gave him a guarded look.

"Well, you are not a prisoner here," he said solemnly, "But if you must go back, I insist on taking you back on my own spirit steed."

"You have a spirit steed too?"

Byakuya nodded.

"I will take you back in the morning, as long as our healer deems you well enough to make the journey."

"Thanks, Byakuya," Ichigo said, giving the noble a relieved smile, "It'll be good to be in my own house and with my family. Not that I don't like it here. You've been really generous and Akio and Matsuko-san have totally spoiled me. I just…"

"I understand," Byakuya said calmly, "I will see that the preparations for the trip are made."

Ichigo felt a warm flutter inside and a little smile formed on his lips.

"You know, Byakuya, you don't have to take me, yourself. Akio could escort me. I know you're really busy."

Byakuya gave him a dismissive look.

"Nonsense," he huffed softly, "It is the least that I can do for you, considering."

Byakuya rose and walked to the garden doors, where he paused, looking out into the partially restored gardens as Ichigo set his teacup down, watching the noble closely.

"I was dying, Ichigo," Byakuya said in an oddly vulnerable sounding tone, "You are aware of this…that if I had not been sent to the royal realm to be healed, I would have died."

"Y-yeah," Ichigo whispered, closing his eyes for a moment as he remembered the horrifying state he had found the noble in.

"I was not just dying. I was dying alone, and in disgrace," Byakuya went on, his voice softening even more, "The very first thing you did when you arrived in Soul Society was to come to me and reassure me that Rukia and Renji were still alive."

Ichigo tried to answer, but found his voice stopped in his throat.

"You took on the burden of protecting Soul Society, as I and my comrades had failed to do. You eased the weight on my heart so that I could die peacefully. And I knew…that you would not fail."

Ichigo swallowed hard, wiping away a tear that had escaped onto his face.

"I don't know if I did all of that," he said shakily, "I didn't comfort you that much. I didn't even answer when you asked me to protect Soul Society."

"Of course you did," Byakuya chided him in a voice barely above a whisper.

He turned back towards Ichigo and walked to the bed, where he paused, gazing down into Ichigo's damp, widened eyes.

"You answered with this," he continued, wrenching a little sob from deep in the younger man's chest as the fingers of the slender hand that the quincy attack had torn from the noble's body touched his breast, just over his pounding heart, "Every step you took, every hurt you suffered, every bit of pain that befell you…it was how you paid the price for our failures, and how you saved us when we could not save ourselves. This is why you will _always_ be welcome in my home and I will _always_ consider you…a friend."

Ichigo tried again to find his voice, but couldn't make a sound as Byakuya sat down on the bed, then stunned him completely with a warm, strong embrace.

"Thank you, Kurosaki ichigo."

Ichigo closed his eyes tightly and clenched his jaw, barely hanging onto a calm expression as Byakuya's arms released him and the noble stood and headed for the inner bedroom door.

"Byakuya," Ichigo called softly.

He was silenced all over again as Byakuya turned back, revealing where two tears had escaped onto his lovely, pale face.

"I am…very sorry for what you suffered because of my failure…our failure to stop the quincies. If I could carry a measure of the weight on your heart, know that I would."

Ichigo managed a little smile.

"I know you would. Thank you, Byakuya."

"Good night, Ichigo."

"Good night."

Ichigo watched as Byakuya left the room, then expelled a long sigh and looked down at his food tray with increased interest.

 _I do feel a little better, remembering that it wasn't for nothing that I suffered. I protected my family, my friends…and a whole lot of other people too._

"Ichigo?" Rukia's voice called from the garden doorway.

Ichigo managed a weary smile.

"Hey, Rukia," he greeted her, his smile warming as she entered the room alongside Renji, Uryu, Sado and Orihime, "Hey guys."

"How are you feeling?" Renji asked, "Got a headache from that stage flop?"

"Renji!" Rukia scolded him, "He didn't even fall down."

"That's right," Sado agreed, "Byakuya caught you."

"Sorry we were too far away to help," Uryu apologized.

"It's fine. I'm okay," Ichigo assured them, "I just…got kinda dizzy."

"They should have waited longer for the ceremony," Rukia said, shaking her head disapprovingly, "Central 46 was just in hurry to reassure everyone that they're safe now."

"Even though they kind of aren't," Renji said skeptically, "What with the kamikaze attacks some of the remaining quincies are trying."

"Enough about that," Rukia said, frowning, "Ichigo, Renji and I wanted to share some good news with you."

"Oh?"

"Yeah," Renji said, smirking proudly, "Rukia and I are getting married."

"You are?" Ichigo said, perking up and smiling more widely at the news, "You finally got up the nerve to ask her, huh, Renji?"

"Well, not exactly," Rukia said, rolling her eyes.

"I was gonna!" Renji objected, "Hey, I asked Taichou for permission."

"You mean, he cornered you and made you agree to marry me!" Rukia corrected him saucily.

"He didn't make me!" Renji snapped, "As a matter of fact, I _did_ ask him."

"Yeah, right!" Rukia laughed, "He was prompting you the whole time and you barely got your tongue untied by the end of it!"

"What? Were you hiding and spying on us?" Renji complained, "Rukia, I was standing there naked!"

"He was naked in front of Byakuya?" Sado whispered to Uryu.

"He came in while I was getting dressed!" Renji explained, blushing, "We've seen each other naked before. It's no big deal! We're taichou and fukutaichou for kami's sake. There's no part of each other we _haven't_ seen. And it's _not_ sexual!"

"Which is why you were turning as red as your hair while he was talking to you," Rukia teased him.

"Hey!"

Ichigo relaxed slightly, letting the friendly banters bring back some of the warmth that had seemed to escape him before.

 _I should've let them in sooner_ , he chided himself, _I need them to make me feel normal again._

XXXXXXXXXX

Kuchiki Koji entered the kitchen just in time to see Tetsuya accept a tea tray from the house cook, to carry to the Shima leader's visiting mother. His green eyes narrowed and he gave his master a curious look.

"Tetsuya-san, you don't have to do that, you know," Koji chuckled, "That's why we have house attendants."

"It's all right, Koji-san," Tetsuya said, smiling, "I enjoy spending time with Magdelina-sama."

"Ah, she is very kind," Koji acknowledged.

"It makes me think of when I had my mother with me," Tetsuya said wistfully, "She talks to me like I belong to her family, even though we only met recently. And I enjoy her stories about Kuri-kuri-sama."

"He is a different sort, for a clan leader," Koji mused, "Where Byakuya-sama meticulously follows the rules, it seems that Kurushimi-sama, likes to make the rules up for himself…or, so I have heard."

"You've heard correctly," Tetsuya laughed, "I don't think I would dare do any of the things that he has done. I think Byakuya-sama would have me committed."

"Probably," Koji snickered, "Would you like any help, Tetsuya-san?"

"No, thank you, Koji-san. I have it."

"Will you want a bath later?"

"In a bit," Tetsuya said, heading out of the kitchen, "I will probably stay and talk to Magdelina-sama for awhile."

"Just let me know when you are ready."

Tetsuya carried the food tray down the wooden walkway, slowing and stopping just short of the room as voices floated out.

"Aha," Magdelina said in a gentle tone, "So, you decided to wake up and stop worrying everyone, _mijo_?"

"Eh, _Mamà_ , you are all right?" Kuri asked, blinking to clear his eyes, "I saw them knock you down, the bastards!"

"I am fine. Don't worry," Magdelina said reassuringly, "You are the one who was taken and then cut up by those monsters. You are lucky that _angelito_ found you when he did and healed you enough so that you wouldn't die. You know, he has been here every day to sit with me and to watch over you."

"He has?" Kuri mused, a little smile touching his lips.

"And it got me to thinking."

"Oh no, _Mamà_ ," Kuri complained, "I only just woke up! Can't you wait to try to marry me off until at least the war is over?"

"The war has been over for a week, _mijo_!" Magdelina said sternly, "And you know what that means. The elders have been more than patient while you mourned your husband, and while you made excuses…"

"We were just at war. That is a pretty good excuse!" Kuri argued.

"But you have dragged your feet for twenty years!"

"You know why, _Mamà_."

"Of course I do," the elder woman assured him, "I understand you are reluctant. But all clan leaders must at least attempt to provide children for the clan. It is what you agreed to when you took your father's place at the head of the family. It is your duty, _mijo_."

"I tried to have children," Kuri sighed, "and you saw what happened."

"Yes," Magdelina agreed, "You suffered a terrible loss. But you are not the only one. We all lose people we love. Some of us lose the people closest to our hearts, but our hearts do not die, Kuri!"

"I feel like mine has," Kuri sighed wearily.

"Maybe, but I was here when Tetsuya-san arrived with you. I watched how you looked at him and how he cared for you."

"He would have done that for _anyone_!" Kuri objected, "That is just the kind of person he is."

"But he didn't do this for anyone else, _mijo_. He did it for you. And you know that it reached you. I saw it."

"So what if it did?" Kuri said, scowling.

"Tetsuya-san has faced just the kind of loss that you have, Kuri. He lost his husband and the child he was carrying when he escaped the noble's prison. More than that, he was forced to grow up without his family."

"He has Byakurai," Kuri pointed out, "He is completely devoted to his leader. And wasn't he adopted by one of the relatives?"

"Sadao and Mai," Magdelina supplied, "But he does not live with them now."

"He is happy here. He should stay here," Kuri insisted, "I won't drag him into my problems."

Magdelina slipped a hand into her son's, meeting his eyes searchingly.

" _Mijo_ , Tetsuya-san lives with these same problems every day. You would be a comfort to each other. You need each other."

"What I _need_ is for you to stop pushing me about this and let me sleep," Kuri said irascibly.

"You have just slept for six days, _burro_ ," Magdelina chuckled, "That's not enough for you?"

Sensing the lull in their conversation, Tetsuya stepped into the room.

" _Buenas noches_ ," Tetsuya greeted them, politely, "I have brought tea, and I will give you another pain block if you need one, Kuri-kuri-sama."

"That would be good," Kuri answered, giving his mother a petulant look, "I have a terrible headache."

"That happens sometimes upon waking after a long period of unconsciousness," Tetsuya commented, setting the tea tray in Magdelina's lap, then moving to Kuri's side.

"Especially if one wakes to his mother nagging him about getting married and making babies."

Tetsuya froze for a moment, then forced his hands into position to set the pain block.

"What do you think, Tetsu-hana?"

" _Gomen nasai?_ " Tetsuya said uncertainly, a little flush touching his fair cheeks, "Tetsu-hana? Kuri-kuri-sama has made a nickname for me now?"

"And why not?" Kuri chuckled good naturedly, "It seems you have a habit of taking care of injured strays, like me. The least I can do to thank you is to give you a pretty nickname that suits you."

Kuri paused and gave him a teasing wink.

"But you haven't answered my question, Tetsu-hana. What do you think about forcing people to marry strangers and have babies?"

"That is a difficult question," Tetsuya admitted, "I think that people should marry someone they love, but I understand that the clans depend of the growth of continued strength to survive."

"So, if Byakurai arranged you to marry someone, you would do so?"

Tetsuya smiled.

I am fortunate that Byakuya-sama would think carefully before taking such an action, so if he did ask this of me, I would know it was important and I would accept it."

"But you would defy the order if it just came from your stuffy elders and not your trusted cousin?"

"I would resist it. Yes," Tetsuya answered, "I do not want to be married again. I was married once and I lost both my husband and my child. Taking the risk of it happening again would be terrifying. I understand why you don't want this. You have lost someone too. Although…the good thing about marrying someone who has shared a similar loss is that one would understand the other. And a loss that is shared doesn't feel so heavy, I suppose."

Kuri's eyes narrowed.

"Tetsu-hana, are you working with my mother to marry me off to you?" he asked, frowning.

"Kuri!" Magdelina objected.

"It's a fair question!" Kuri insisted, "So, tell me, Tetsu-hana. Did _Mamà_ ask you if you would agree to a marriage to me?"

Tetsuya bit his lip gently and his blush deepened.

"She did ask me," he confessed.

"And how did you answer her?" Kuri pressed curiously.

Tetsuya took a steadying breath.

"I said that I would only do such a thing if it was Kuri-kuri-sama's wish," he answered, his voice shaking slightly.

"But…could it be your wish too?" Kuri persisted, "I am a broken thing, Tetsu-hana, and I know you are also."

"Yes," Tetsuya agreed, "but sometimes two broken things can be put together…to make both whole again."

"And you think we might be able to do this? Two strangers who hardly know each other?"

"We don't know the little things about each other," Tetsuya reasoned, "But we know each others' pain. That is what makes me think we could."

Kuri found his face taken over by a sudden, genuine smile.

"Then, if Tetsu-hana is willing to try…I will try too."


	4. Stain

**Chapter 4: Stain**

 **(I'm on the run today, so I will have to catch up on shout outs on the next chapter. But the wait will be short. I am not able to escape the muse on this one! Enjoy the chapter. Love, Spunky)**

Ichigo looked up and smiled as Shima Aderia entered his guest room alongside her slim, gentle-eyed husband.

"Hi Aderia, Ogano," he greeted them, sitting up straighter.

"Good morning, Ichigo," Aderia replied, "Byakuya tells us that you are eager to leave us."

"Well, not to be rude or anything," Ichigo assured her, "but I really wanna go home. It's been more than a week since the war ended and I have a life back there that's been on hold for a while."

"I understand," Aderia assured him, "But before we can say that you are ready to go, we must make sure that you are up to the trip."

"Okay," Ichigo answered, nodding, "It's fine. Go ahead."

He sat quietly in the bed as Ogano checked his vital signs and Aderia carefully examined him.

"How was your sleep last night?" Aderia asked.

"Better," Ichigo lied, "No nightmares last night."

"Then what were you up to?" Aderia teased him gently, "Because I can see you are not well-rested."

"Okay, I woke up a few times," Ichigo admitted reluctantly, "I'm restless from being in bed so much. Is that a big deal?"

"Not so much," Aderia assured him, "It's good for you to be up and around a little, now that your more serious injuries have had time to heal. You should just be taking it slow and staying close to home. Add a little more activity as you begin to feel stronger. And try to keep a calm, peaceful environment."

"Right," Ichigo said, smirking, "My home isn't very peaceful. My sisters are okay, but my dad can be a pain in the a… _in the rear_ sometimes."

Ichigo barely heard Aderia's reply as a thought struck him suddenly.

 _I still haven't told anyone what Dad told me about my mom and him. They still don't know I'm a Shiba. Do I want anyone to know? I didn't see Dad at the ceremony, so he must've gone home after Uryu saw him in the royal realm. I wonder if he's planning on going back or not. I guess not, if he hasn't said anything._

 _Damn…_

"Ichigo, did you hear what I said?" Aderia asked suddenly.

"Eh, sorry," Ichigo apologized, smiling ruefully, "My mind kinda wandered off."

"It all right," the healer assured him, "You have a lot on your mind. But I asked you if you have something set up so that you will receive psychological counseling for post-war stress."

"Oh, uh, no I don't really," Ichigo confessed, "But I'll take care of it."

"I can recommend the vizard Hachi," Aderia suggested, "You already know him and you know he is capable."

"Right," Ichigo agreed, "Or Kisuke can set me up with something. I'll get that taken care of."

"Please do," Aderia urged him, "Post-war stress is a very common condition, but left untreated, it can spiral into a more serious situation. I recommend that you set up your first appointment within the next week or two and follow a course of treatment until your physician feels you have sufficiently recovered."

"Got it."

"Very well," Aderia said approvingly, "You seem to be well enough as long as you are not traveling on foot, which Byakuya assures me you're not."

"Right. He's taking me on his spirit steed, so you don't need to worry about me working myself too hard."

Ichigo paused and thought for a moment.

"Hey uh, Aderia, can I ask you something kinda private?"

"Of course, Ichigo."

"Um…" Ichigo said hesitantly, glancing momentarily at Ogano.

Aderia's husband smiled and nodded briefly.

"I will wait outside for you," he said, kissing Aderia on the cheek.

Ichigo watched as he left, then looked back at Aderia.

"Sorry," he apologized, "I just…don't feel like having a lot of people know about this. You look like you already know what I'm talking about."

"I think so, but you should say it anyway, so that we are clear," Aderia suggested.

"You know because you have been the one mostly in charge of taking care of me. It's good that you haven't told too many people, you know, because it's private."

"I understand."

Ichigo paused again, looking out the garden doors and taking a steadying breath.

"Can you tell me who else knows that I was…that Ywach…attacked me sexually?"

"Of course," Aderia answered, "Besides me, only the first responder who found you knows the full extent of the injuries you suffered."

"And that was?"

"Kuchiki taichou."

"Oh," Ichigo answered, closing his eyes for a moment, "Okay, thanks. I wasn't sure."

"You can be sure that Byakuya will remain completely discreet about the field medical assessment he conducted on you."

"I'm sure he will," Ichigo answered, an edge of relief in his voice, "I just…needed to know."

Aderia gave him a gentle smile and touched him lightly on the arm.

"Ichigo, I strongly suggest that when you arrange for your counseling that you pass this on to your counselor. Sexual assault can have long term repercussions. It is important that it be treated by a professional."

"Yeah, okay," Ichigo said wearily, "I'll take care of it."

"Then, I will clear you now for the trip back."

"Good," Ichigo sighed, "I've been away too long. It's time for me to go back there and live something like a normal life."

"Well, it may be a while before you feel settled inside, but with time, you will."

"Thanks Aderia," Ichigo sighed, "You and Byakuya have been really great."

"You have been through a terrible struggle and you saved many, many lives, Ichigo," Aderia said gratefully, "Go home and take comfort in the peace there."

Ichigo managed a tired smile.

"I will."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Magdelina," Byakuya greeted the Shima matriarch as he stepped into Kuri's guest room, "Shima Kurushimi. I understand that the two of you wished to see me."

Tetsuya rose from the seat he occupied next to Magdelina.

"I will leave you to talk," he said, turning towards the door.

"I don't think it's right for you to be excluded when this concerns you also, Tetsu-hana," Kuri said, stopping him, "Please stay."

Tetsuya hesitated for a moment, flushing slightly at the curious look Byakuya gave him, then he sat down again.

"Of course, Shima-sama," he answered politely.

"What is this regarding?" Byakuya asked, "Is there a problem with your housing or treatment here?"

"Not at all," Magdelina chuckled, "Your staff has been completely accommodating while we've been waiting for the repairs on Shima Adobe to reach the point where we could take Kuri home. Your cousin, Tetsuya-san, has been especially good to us, coming every day to sit and talk with me, and making sure that my son was comfortable."

"I see," Byakuya replied, glancing at Tetsuya inquisitively, "I understand Tetsuya is also the one who originally found Kurushimi on the outer part of our property."

"Yes, he did," Kuri confirmed.

"It was more like he found me," Tetsuya said, smiling shyly, "I was investigating an oddity in the reiatsu out near the lake and Shima-sama staggered into me and we fell into the water."

"Your Tetsu-hana kept me from drowning and provided first aid that kept me alive until I could reach safety here. For that, I am very grateful."

"I was only attending to my duties," Tetsuya said, his blush darkening.

"This is true," Magdelina said, taking Tetsuya's hand, "but we are well aware that even if it was not your duty, you would have done the same."

She turned her head to meet Byakuya's eyes again.

"Tetsuya-san is a kind, gentle boy with respectable powers and an honorable reputation."

"I am very proud, both of Tetsuya's abilities and his actions," Byakuya acknowledged, "I am glad that he was able to assist you in your time of need. But…"

"Byakuya," Magdelina went on, "you are aware that almost since the day that my Kuri lost his husband and child, our elders have been _encouraging_ him to remarry, as he has an agreement with them, as all clan leaders do, to provide children for the continuance of my Kuri's powers in our bloodline."

Byakuya's eyes took on a more guarded look and he glanced at Tetsuya, who managed to look back with relative calm.

"I have heard," Byakuya affirmed, "Are you asking me if Tetsuya will act as a breeder for those children?"

"Byakurai!" Kuri said, sounding offended.

"My apologies," Byakuya answered solemnly, "but…other clans have requested it, and I have always declined."

"Of course," Magdelina agreed, "You love your cousin, whom you saved from imprisonment, and you want the best for him."

"I do," Byakuya said, watching Tetsuya's face carefully, "But if you do not wish for Tetsuya to act as a breeder, then are you saying…?"

"I would like to make an agreement with you for your Tetsuya-san to marry my Kuri."

Byakuya stiffened slightly and looked from Tetsuya to Kuri and back again.

"And how do you feel about this arrangement?" he asked Kuri.

"Marriage is the last thing I want right now, to be honest with you, Byakurai," Kuri answered.

"And yet, you want me to commit my cousin, whose well-being is very important to me and who is taichou level and certainly does not have to do this, to such a marriage?" Byakuya asked, an edge of anger in his voice.

"I was only being honest with you about my feelings in regards to being married," Kuri explained, "You have not asked me to tell you how I feel about marrying Tetsu-hana."

Byakuya's eyes narrowed and he gave Kuri a cynical look.

"And how _do_ you feel about marrying my cousin?" he asked skeptically.

Kuri smiled and took Tetsuya's hand, making him blush even more furiously and igniting a look of barely concealed mayhem in Byakuya'a dark grey orbs.

"When I first laid eyes on your cousin, I saw, not a shinigami, but an angel," Kuri answered, keeping his eyes focused on Tetsuya.

"I was in a waterform and the lightning revealed me, just as Shima-sama collided with me," Tetsuya explained.

"We toppled over the cliff together," Kuri went on, "and fell into the black water. I was barely conscious, but as I started to pass out, light appeared around him and this angel looked into my eyes and told me to breathe. I was sure I would drown, but because of him, I did not. He helped me to the shore and then kept me from dying. And ever since, he has made sure that my mother was comforted while I was unconscious, and that I was relieved of my pain as much as possible."

"And?" Byakuya inquired, his dark eyes still reflecting a dangerous look.

"As I said," Kuri continued, "I do not want to be married. I have been married before, and like your own marriage to the lovely Hisana, it ended sadly. I have mourned my Hideaki for twenty years, and the pain has not ever left me."

"And you want to burden Tetsuya with marriage to a man who does not want him?" Byakuya asked, taking on a more troubled look.

"How do you feel about this, Tetsuya?"

Tetsuya's eyes rose and held Byakuya's steadily as he answered.

"I don't want to be married either," he replied honestly, "Even though my Naoki and our son died more than sixty years ago, the pain never leaves me. But…I know that, now that the war has brought light to my abilities, our own elders will pressure you to marry me to someone for their purposes. And Byakuya-sama will want to resist, but it will cause more cracks in your already fractured relationship with the council. This is not good for anyone. Shima-sama has promised to give me a good, loving home and children to comfort me. There is also something that we can give each other that no one else could offer us."

"And that is?"

"Shima-sama will never ask me to forget my Naoki," Tetsuya answered, "And I will never expect him to forget his Hideaki. We will still mourn, but we will not do so alone. We will give each other comfort that neither of us have had before. And perhaps with time, we may be able to fall in love again. That is what I think, Byakuya-sama."

"I believe the same as your cousin," Kuri said quietly, squeezing Tetsuya's hand, "And I will do everything I can to make him happy."

"And you want me to agree to this arrangement? This is really what you want, _watashi no itoko_?" Byakuya asked, an unusual amount of affection in his voice.

"It is," Tetsuya confirmed.

Byakuya was quiet for a moment, then he took a slow, deep breath.

"I will approve the match," he said solemnly, "Magdelina, please have your courier deliver the request to our council."

Magdelina smiled widely.

"I will do that right now," she said, standing and patting Tetsuya on the cheek, "I am so pleased that Tetsuya-san will be joining our family!"

Byakuya watched as she left the room, then he rounded on Kuri, the challenging look returning to his eyes.

"Let me make something perfectly clear," he warned the Shima leader, "I am only agreeing to this because it is Tetsuya's will, and because he is likely correct about our council pressuring me to arrange a match for him against his will, now that his abilities have attracted attention, due to his actions in the war. If you _ever_ hurt my cousin, there is no length I will not go to, to make you regret it!"

Before Kuri could answer, Byakuya whirled and flash stepped away, leaving Tetsuya and the Shima leader staring at the place he had been.

"Whew!" Kuri chuckled, smirking and shaking his head, "He must really love you, Tetsu-hana. For a moment, I thought he might get mad enough to kill me."

XXXXXXXXXX

Ichigo smiled as Torio exited the Kuchiki stable, leading a tall, lovely paint stallion that nipped playfully at the attendant's hair as he moved at a graceful walk.

"Stop that!" Torio laughed, ducking his head aside, "Ichigo-sama, this is Byakuya-sama's spirit steed, Ikazuchi."

"He's beautiful," the shinigami substitute said appreciatively, "Does he speak to Byakuya like Arashi speaks to Tetsuya?"

"He can," Torio explained, "but like most of the spirit steeds, he prefers not to. Spirit steeds are proud beasts, and Arashi and Tetsuya are…a little different."

"How…?" Ichigo began, but he was stopped as Byakuya flash stepped into the corral area wearing a slightly piqued expression.

"Ichigo," he greeted the shinigami substitute.

"You okay?" Ichigo asked, "You look kinda flustered."

"It is nothing," Byakuya said off-handedly, "Come, we should be going."

Byakuya climbed onto Ikazuchi's back, then waited as Torio helped Ichigo mount behind him.

"You may hold onto me," Byakuya invited him, "but you should also hold on firmly with your legs. Have you ridden before?"

"Sometimes, yeah," Ichigo answered, "I think I can stay on."

Byakuya touched the stallion's sides, setting him off at a comfortable walk. Ichigo paused for a moment, considering, then he wrapped his arms lightly around the noble's waist. Byakuya kept the stallion at a gentle pace as they headed for the central senkaimon.

"They're doing a good job of cleaning up," Ichigo observed, looking around at the partially reconstructed buildings, "Pretty soon, it won't even look like there was a war."

"But we will not forget," Byakuya added, "Too much has happened."

"Yeah," Ichigo agreed sadly, "I know the sixth lost a lot of soldiers. All of the divisions did. I'm sorry."

"It cannot be helped," Byakuya surmised, "The quincies were a formidable enemy, and we were not at all prepared to face them. We are lucky that the Seireitei was not completely destroyed…that our worlds were not destroyed."

"Did anyone ever say why no one saw this coming?" Ichigo asked, "I mean, there was a first war with the quincies."

"But we believed the quincies to all have perished," Byakuya recalled, "Except for a few like Ishida Uryu, who had broken away from the group and wanted to live peacefully. We had no idea what was building in the shadows."

"I'm just glad it's over and Ywach is gone. I never met anyone that evil before. When that royal guard lady said that he was more evil than Aizen, she had it right."

"You ended that evil," Byakuya reminded him, gently nudging Ikazuchi towards the opening senkaimon ahead of them, "You deserve the peace that we will have now."

"I just wish it was more peaceful inside my head," Ichigo sighed, "I just keep replaying parts of it, things that happened. I don't want to, but I can't seem to stop it."

"Aderia must have recommended some therapy for that, did she not?" Byakuya asked, looking ahead of them as they entered the precipice world.

"Yeah, she did," Ichigo assured him, "I'll do that. I just…want to get home first and settle in."

"Just be sure that you do not neglect that part of your recovery," Byakuya advised him, "It is procedure in the Gotei 13 to offer psychological support after a major conflict. You are not alone in being affected by what you witnessed and experienced."

"Will you be getting counseling?" Ichigo asked.

"I will be seeing our family counselor," Byakuya answered, "Leaders are actually required to have that support on a regular basis."

"Really?"

"Yes. It ensures that the one making most of the clan's most important decisions will be in a proper state of mind for doing so."

"Right. That makes sense," Ichigo mused.

He smiled ruefully.

"Although, the most important decisions I'll be making are where I want to go to college and what major I'll choose."

He sighed softly and closed his eyes.

"I don't really even know what I want to be."

"It will come to you," Byakuya assured him, "When you have had time for your body to heal and your mind to become peaceful again, your path will be more clear to you. You just…"

Byakuya's voice trailed off and Ichigo felt Ikazuchi stiffen beneath them as a brightness welled up in the corridor ahead of them and a hail of white quincy arrows shot towards them.

Instantly, Byakuya disappeared from the horse's back and Ikazuchi's reiatsu swelled protectively around Ichigo.

"Byakuya!" Ichigo shouted, starting to dismount.

 _Stay with me!_ the stallion's voice hissed warningly in Ichigo's mind, _Your powers have not returned to you yet. You will get in the way._

He understood immediately that the horse's words weren't meant to be harsh, but they stung his insides nonetheless as he watched Byakuya's petal blades fill the corridor, slashing at their attackers and slowly driving them back.

"Yeah," he whispered, lowering his head, "you're right. Sorry, I just…"

 _You are a fighter. You have a fighter's instincts_ , Ikazuchi acknowledged, _I meant no offense._

"It's okay," Ichigo said quietly, relaxing as the attacking quincies turned to run, "We all have times when we're weak, right?"

The horse gave no answer, but turned his head and nuzzled Ichigo's leg for a moment, huffing out a soft breath.

Ahead of them, the light from Byakuya's shikai faded, revealing several collapsed bodies in the now empty corridor. Ikazuchi carried Ichigo forward to meet Byakuya, who stood looking warily ahead of them.

"These packs of fighters are a nuisance," he sighed, holding a hand to his side, "But with the Sternritters gone, they haven't the strength to fight a prolonged battle, or one with anyone of respectable power. Still, they are dangerous."

"Especially while I'm powerless," Ichigo added, "I'll be protected at home. You don't have to worry about that."

"Very well," Byakuya said, falling in beside the horse and still holding a hand to his side.

"Hey," Ichigo said worriedly, "Are you okay? Did you get hit by an arrow?"

"I was grazed," Byakuya sighed, "It is minor and I will have it seen to after you are delivered home safely."

"Hey, at least let me stop the bleeding for you and bandage the thing," Ichigo insisted.

"No," Byakuya said firmly, "It is not good to spend additional time here. We need to leave the area."

He remained on his feet and walking slightly ahead as Ikazuchi followed with Ichigo on his back. Ichigo tried several times to start a conversation, but Byakuya only gave him short, slightly distracted responses as he carefully watched the path ahead of them. Both men breathed a sigh of relief as they exited the precipice world and touched down in front of Ichigo's home.

"You want to come in?" Ichigo asked, sliding down off the horse's back, "I don't think my dad's home, but my sisters are here. Yuzu's a good cook. You should at least have me look at that wound before you go."

"I told you it is fine," Byakuya said stubbornly, turning to leave, "Thank you again, Ichigo."

He started to turn towards the still open senkaimon, then made an exclamation of pain and collapsed into Ichigo's surprised arms. Ichigo called his name urgently, then stiffened in surprise as someone appeared beside him and shocked the noble into unconsciousness. A moment later, he realized…

"Dad, what the hell are you _doing_? You knocked him out completely!" Ichigo complained.

"Yeah, well, he'll be easier to heal that way," Isshin answered, frowning, "and I didn't think I should let him see me until you and I had a chance to talk about things."

A little jolt of realization touched Ichigo's insides.

"That's right. Byakuya knows you from before."

"Exactly why I've never let him or any of the others who know me, see me," Isshin explained, "But we'll talk later. Give him to me."

Isshin stole Byakuya from Ichigo's arms and tossed him carelessly over a shoulder.

"Hey, be careful! He's hurt, you know," Ichigo objected.

Isshin paused as blood dribbled down onto his shoulder.

"Yeah, a little more than grazed, huh? Don't worry, he'll be all right. Let's get him inside."

"Yeah, okay," Ichigo agreed, falling in with his father.

"Son," Isshin said more solemnly, "It's good to have you home."


	5. Safety

**Chapter 5: Safety**

 **(Omg...*sobs* being killed with work again! But I won't crumble under the pressure. I have a ton of chapters all begging to be finished, so I'm writing when I'm not working, eating or sleeping. Can't freaking wait for the weekend! Just one more day...*eyes cross...collapses* Enjoy the chapter! Love, Spunky)**

"Dad," Ichigo said worriedly, watching as his father peeled back the top of Byakuya's blood soaked uniform, revealing a large, leaking wound on the left side of his ribs, "is Byakuya going to be all right? That looks really bad."

"It's bad enough," Isshin sighed, "A deep puncture, nicked a lung, and there are some crazy things happening. That's why I've called for backup."

"Well, when's that help going to get here?" Ichigo asked impatiently, "The bleeding's not stopping."

"The reiatsu used to make the arrow was infused with an anti-coagulant to make the…"

"To make the wound bleed more," Ichigo finished hastily, "Those bastards…"

"Yeah, well that isn't the only complication. The malevolent reiatsu is also causing a contraction in Byakuya's spirit centers that is screwing with his ability to channel his own reiatsu."

"So, it's interfering with his powers?" Ichigo concluded.

"Not just his powers," Isshin said, grabbing Ichigo's hand and placing it over gauze he had placed on the bleeding wound, "Powers or no powers, we have to circulate a certain amount of reiatsu in our bodies, all of us do…shinigamis, humans, quincies, hollows. Anything that interferes with that can quickly become life threatening."

"Shit!"

"Hey, don't panic," Isshin scolded him, "I told you. I called in some really competent help. Byakuya's going to be fine. Nothing knocks that guy down for too long. He's too damned stubborn to die from anything as simple as blood loss or reiatsu disruption."

"But, what do we…?"

The question was left hanging as the door opened and Ishida Ryuuken entered the treatment room alongside Ishida Uryu.

"Uryu," Ichigo greeted his friend, "thanks for coming."

The two younger men flinched and colored as Isshin flustered Ryuuken with a welcoming kiss.

"Sorry to pull you away from the hospital," he apologized, chuckling at the elder quincy's piqued reaction.

"It looks as though one of your old comrades has met with some of the rebel quincies," Ryuuken acknowledged, taking up a position beside Byakuya and beginning a quick examination.

"The arrow was infused with a disruptor, a good one, as well as an anti-coagulant," Isshin reported, "I thought you would be better at treating those, and also seeing if there was anything else they thought to throw in."

Ryuuken nodded briefly and examined the leaking wound. He slipped on a pair of protective gloves, then gently pulled back the edges of the cut.

"I have to open the wound again to make sure to draw out all of the malevolent reiatsu. You've done a good job, for one less familiar with quincy medicine, but this man needs a full evacuation or this could become life threatening."

"But, Byakuya's gonna be okay, right?" Ichigo asked anxiously.

"I will heal him," Ryuuken promised, "He will need a day or two of recovery time during which he will need perfect rest. He can do that here or if you must move him, take him no farther than Urahara's shop. There may be flickers in reiatsu for the next week or so, but he will make a full recovery."

"I can make myself scarce if you just want to keep him here," Isshin offered.

"He should stay up in my room where no one will bother him too much," Ichigo decided.

"Except for Kon, you mean," Uryu said, smirking very slightly.

"Ugh, he'd better not bug Byakuya. As far as the shinigamis are concerned, there aren't supposed to be special mod souls like him anymore. They were supposed to have all been destroyed."

"They seem to have a thing for destroying those who are different, don't they," Uryu remarked dryly.

"Not all of them," Ichigo insisted, "Byakuya's not like that. I think a lot of shinigamis are better than that."

"It is just that some in the highest positions are like that," Ryuuken said solemnly, touching gentle fingertips to Byakuya's wound and infusing the area with healing reiatsu, "But then, we quincies are equally guilty of simply trying to destroy what is different. And our king destroying their society was no better than their leadership destroying ours."

"It's a damned waste, that's what it is," Isshin mused, shaking his head, "It's all so stupid. It's just a matter of balancing the shinigami's need to maintain the balance of souls with the quincy tendency to destroy hollows completely. I'm sure we could learn to cooperate. Hell, Ryuu and I learned."

"Yes, and if you will remember, you took it too far and it got your clan banished."

Ichigo's eyes widened.

"That's why the Shiba clan was banished, Dad?" he asked curiously, "You didn't mention that when you told me about Mom."

"Y-yeah, well, we didn't have a lot of time to work with, you know, so…"

"Whatever," Ichigo sighed, rolling his eyes, "I think I'm just starting to accept that everybody else knows more about me and my parents than I do."

"I said I would explain," Isshin insisted.

"Later," Ichigo said off-handedly, "Right now, we should just focus on healing Byakuya. He got hurt protecting me."

"That is curious," Ryuuken commented, looking up at Ichigo for a moment before continuing the reiatsu extraction.

"What's curious?" Ichigo asked, "Byakuya's my friend. We've been through a lot. Is it so surprising that he would protect me?"

"That wasn't what was curious," the elder quincy went on, studying Byakuya's comely face more closely, "What I meant was that I could see rebel quincies attacking a shinigami, but I would think that, as strapped for power as they are, and given that they know your mother was a quincy, I would have expected they would try to convince you to support their cause. But maybe Byakuya's presence inhibited them from doing that."

"I just finished fighting those guys in the war!" Ichigo objected, "Why would they be…?"

"Think about it," Uryu said quietly, "Ywach and the sternritters are gone. They have only the power of the old noble quincy families. Your mom was a pureblood noble quincy and she was powerful. They also know that even though you have helped the shinigamis, you aren't under their influence exactly. You are known for doing pretty much what you want to. That makes you dangerous, but it also means that it would be advantageous to them to have you on their side."

"That they have chosen not to approach you, and have attacked you gives one pause," Ryuuken added, nodding in approval as he finished the evacuation of Byakuya's wound and infused the area again with cleansing and soothing reiatsu. He looked at Isshin in askance.

"I don't sense any more disruption, do you?"

"None," Isshin concurred, "Looks good here."

"His reiatsu is stable and although there was significant blood loss, I don't believe we need to transfuse him."

"We'll just give him a lot of fluids and get him eating as soon as he wakes up."

Ryuuken paused, studying Isshin for a moment.

"Will you be letting him see you, at some point?" he asked.

"Eh," Isshin sighed, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck, "I think that's still up in the air right now. We'll talk tonight. You uh, don't mind me coming over later, right? Seeing as how I'm not gonna have a place to sleep?"

Ryuuken huffed out a disdainful breath.

"As though that would matter," he muttered, "You would come, just the same."

"Brrrrrr," Ichigo mused, shaking his head, "Tell me again why our dads are _dating_?"

"Don't get me started," Uryu said beneath his breath, "I don't get it any more than you do."

"I don't get it at all," Ichigo complained.

"Hey, give me a hand with him," Isshin said, setting a kido spell that immobilized Byakuya's unconscious body, then another that gently lifted him off of the examination table, "Get down by his feet so we can avoid bumping into any walls on the way."

"Whatever," Ichigo said resignedly, helping his father to guide the injured noble's body out of the clinic and up the stairs to Ichigo's bedroom.

"Where are _you_ gonna sleep?" Isshin asked.

"Don't worry about it," Ichigo answered, turning his gaze onto Byakuya's sleeping face, "I'm going to look after him tonight."

"I told you he's going to be fine," Isshin chided him, "His injuries _could_ have had a more dangerous effect, but Ryuu made sure that didn't happen. All he needs is some rest. He can do that without you losing a night's sleep. You don't look so good, yourself, you know. Are you all right, Son?"

"Not really," Ichigo admitted, "I just need five seconds when somebody's not either trying to kill me or to hurt people I care about. I thought the end of the war meant that we could all give it a rest, but…"

The worry in his father's eyes deepened.

"Ichigo…"

"I'm all right, Dad," Ichigo said shortly, reaching over to open his bedroom door and helping Isshin tuck Byakuya into the bed, "I just need to settle back in here and feel like myself again. No one would feel normal after the shit I just went through."

"you're right about that," Isshin reasoned, "But you know, we should still talk more about…"

"Later, Dad," Ichigo said off-handedly, nudging his father out the bedroom door, "I need to just sit and watch TV, read, do something normal for a while. Whatever you wanna talk to me about can at least wait until I unwind."

He pushed the door shut in his father's still talking face, then turned and pressed his back against it, sighing deeply and closing his eyes.

 _God, I just want to feel like I did before. Why can't I just go back to being like I was?_

He walked to his bed and sat down on the edge, burying his face in his hands and trying in vain to erase how different he felt inside.

 _Ywach really messed me up inside. There's no denying that. But I'm not weak. I can handle what that bastard did to me. Because, no matter what he did, I defeated him in the end. He's dead and I'm…_

A long, ragged breath escaped him.

 _I'm a damned wreck and I know it. But it's okay to get wrecked as long as I didn't let him win. Broken pieces can be put back together. Byakuya and my other friends got pretty trashed too, but they're coming back okay._

 _What the heck is wrong with me?_

He shivered as he remembered the feel of his clothes being torn, his body being roughly held down, drained and abused sexually.

 _I know what the difference is, but…I just can't…I can't go there._

He felt a dragging weariness overtaking him and studied Byakuya's peaceful expression.

 _He's gonna be asleep for a while. I can just lie down next to him and close my eyes for a few minutes. Get some mental distance. I'm sure I'll feel better after some rest, here in my own room._

 _I'm safe in my own home._

 _Safe…_

XXXXXXXXXX

Renji flash stepped after Rukia, his eyes narrowed and his lips quirked at her seeming haste as they made their way through the precipice world.

"Hey, slow down a little," he called after her, "or did you forget that your brother and Ichigo were attacked on this path earlier?"

"That's why I'm hurrying, you fool," Rukia answered shortly, "I need to be sure Nii-sama is all right. Ichigo's message said that he passed out."

"We just don't wanna get attacked here too because we were careless passing through."

"We're not being careless," Rukia said off-handedly, "We know to be on guard."

"Yeah, I suppose," Renji said, catching up to her, "Rukia, don't worry, okay? I don't think Kuchiki taichou was that badly hurt by some lower ranked quincies…"

"They attacked by surprise," Rukia snapped, flushing, "and Nii-sama was protecting Ichigo, who is injured already and doesn't have his powers back yet!"

"Okay, okay! Take it easy. Don't go and bust something now," Renji chuckled, "I'm sure Byakuya is gonna be fine. We'd feel it if he wasn't."

He paused and shook his head.

"It's so weird to call him by name."

"I'm sure it's weirder for him to hear you do that," Rukia mused, looking out into the dark corridor ahead of them, then moving forward.

The two were quiet for a time, looking into the darkness ahead of them as they closed in on the Karakura Town exit.

"Renji," Rukia said, breaking the silence, "can I ask you something?"

"What?"

"Did Ichigo seem all right to you when we saw him before he left with Nii-sama?"

"Whaddya mean _all right_?" Renji sighed, "I mean, he was hurt pretty bad and he passed out cold at the awards ceremony."

"But Aderia cleared him to go home."

"Yeah, on the understanding that he was supposed to go on Byakuya's horse and he was going right to bed when he got home."

"It didn't strike you as strange that Aderia-san let him go when it would have been much better for him to have continued to recuperate at Kuchiki Manor?"

"Ichigo really seemed to think he'd feel better at home."

"Despite having attendants to care for all of his needs and all of us there?" Rukia inquired.

"Well, we can be in Karakura Town too," Renji offered, "and don't you think you'd rather recuperate at home too, rather than someone else's place, where you'd have to worry about imposing?"

"I guess," Rukia said uncertainly, "I just have a strange feeling that it might not have been good for Ichigo to go home just yet."

"Why not?" Renji asked, "I mean, I know his dad can be a pain, but he's a doctor. He can take care of Ichigo. And his sisters can cook for him. He can let down and not have to feel like he's invading someone else's space. I think it's natural for him to want to go home."

"I guess you're right," Rukia sighed, "I just…I don't know. Maybe I'm worrying too much."

"I'll be glad to take your mind off of things for a while," Renji offered, smirking and nudging her up against the corridor wall for an affectionate kiss.

Rukia shoved him away, scowling.

"We're supposed to be on our guard!" she scolded him.

"Eh, what's to worry about? I'm sure those quincy rebels are long gone by now. They know the Gotei's stronger than they are without Ywach and the sternritters. Try not to worry so much."

"I'm not worrying," Rukia said sternly, "I am anticipating possible problems. It heads of trouble. You should try it sometime."

"Cute," Renji huffed, swatting at her and missing.

"Let's go."

XXXXXXXXXX

Ichigo felt his bed move and opened his sleepy eyes to find himself looking into a pair of curious and slightly piqued grey orbs.

"Byakuya," he mumbled, rubbing his hands over his face, "You're awake already? How are you feeling?"

"I am feeling somewhat confused," the noble said disapprovingly, "I am curious as to how it is that I am in your bed, mostly undressed and sleeping next to you. The last thing I remember was arriving at you door."

"Yeah, and then you sort of collapsed," Ichigo chuckled, "I think you were a little more than grazed."

"So it seems," Byakuya agreed, looking down at the bandages on his side.

"My dad healed you," Ichigo informed him, "My dad and a doctor friend of his."

"I see," Byakuya said, frowning, "Human doctors knowledgeable about shinigamis? But I suppose your father had to know something about what was going on with you as your powers blossomed. Where is he? I owe him my gratitude for the healing."

"Eh, he had to go to work at the downtown hospital for the night," Ichigo lied, "He has to do that sometimes."

"Ah, maybe another time, then."

"S-sure," Ichigo said uncertainly, "But um, I'll get out of your way and let you rest. I can have my sister make you something to eat. Dad said that you lost a lot of blood, so you need to eat and drink a lot to make up for it."

"I will rest and eat, of course, but you need to rest as well," Byakuya insisted, starting to sit up.

"No, don't!" Ichigo warned him, watching in dismay as Byakuya winced and groaned in distress, "Lie back down, all right? Dad said that you need at least two days of complete rest, and you're going to get that. Lie down!"

"Ah," Byakuya sighed, laying back down and looking quietly up at Ichigo, "I will make an agreement with you. I will remain here and rest, as you wish, but you must rest also."

"Wh-what, here?" Ichigo asked, flushing slightly at the insinuation.

"There seems to be plenty of room," Byakuya concluded, "I have no problem with it if you do not. If you are uncomfortable, I can have staff come and transport me home."

"No way," Ichigo insisted, "My dad was sure it was best for you not to move around too much. You're not going anywhere until you've had two days rest, like he said."

"You seem to have made up your mind about this."

"Right. Just stay here, okay? If you need something, my sisters can bring it for you."

"I do not need anything right now but, perhaps, more sleep."

"Sounds good to me," Ichigo sighed sleepily, "Just don't forget to eat and drink. You need to do that."

"Later," Byakuya promised, curling around the pillows and closing his eyes.

Ichigo settled next to him, lying on his back and looking up at the ceiling until his eyes closed and he started to drift off.

 _It's strange. Sleeping next to him like this…_

… _feels really, really…_

… _safe…_


	6. Aftermath

**Chapter 6: Aftermath**

 **(Thanks to Sunnami for the nudge to update this one! :) I will have more Bya/Ichi on the way as well! Love to all, Spunky)**

Ichigo came awake suddenly, his heart pounding and Ywach's dread voice sounding loudly in his mind, the sick feeling of his hands gripping tightly, and even his scent seeming to radiate around the room he was sure had been his own when he had gone to sleep. He tried to move, but his body seemed frozen, and although his eyes were open, all he could see at first was the place where the quincy king had held him down and assaulted him. He heard another garbled male voice saying something that might have been his name, but he couldn't make sense of the words. He quivered, working hard to force himself out of what he was sure was just a powerful memory, and very slowly, his senses returned to him.

The first thing that came to him was that he was being held, not roughly or possessively, but with affection and gentleness. The hands that held him knew just how to do so without making him feel confined. The soft, pleasant scent of the one with him soothed him. And he wasn't sure whether it was the words the person whispered, or just how they were delivered warmly into his ear that melted the ice that seemed to have encased his body. He sucked in a shaky breath and touched the other person's arms to show he heard the comforting sentiments.

"Byakuya," he breathed softly, when he could make his voice sound again.

"I am here," the noble answered, continuing to hold him in that same unrestrictive fashion, "You are home. You are safe. I will not let anything happen to you."

Ichigo's throat constricted too tightly for him to answer, so he laid his head on Byakuya's shoulder, breathing slowly as he gradually recovered.

"You have been our protector," Byakuya went on soothingly, "You took upon yourself the hatred and torment of our enemy. He did to you what he wanted to do to us all, Ichigo. He wanted to hold us down, to hurt us, to make us feel helpless. But, unlike you, we could not stop him. Only you could. Once your moment came, you put aside your fears and you fought him with all of the strength that was given to you. You cast him down and stopped him from destroying all of us. We are forever grateful to you for that. So, know that it is all right to turn to us now for comfort. At very least, we owe you our best in trying to heal the hurts that you took upon yourself in defending us."

"I'm okay," Ichigo lied, pulling free of Byakuya's arms and shivering at the sudden return of iciness he felt at the loss of contact.

Byakuya looked back at him quietly for a moment.

"I think if any of us said such a thing after what we have endured, we would be lying," the noble said firmly, but not unkindly, "Ichigo, the war weighs heavily on us all. But it weighs on you most heavily, because you faced and had to overcome an evil unlike any of us had ever seen. I am a taichou of the military. I was raised to understand war and conflict. Even so, I do not think for a moment that one can be all right after what has happened. You do not need to reassure me you are all right. I know you are not. I only want to do all that I can so that you will be."

Byakuya paused, opening up a thoughtful silence and allowing Ichigo time to think.

 _How does he know?_

 _It's like he knows exactly what I'm thinking. He knows just how to hold me and what to say. I feel the fear in me melting away. I feel like it's okay to hold onto him, to let his voice into my head, where it forces Ywach's voice out._

 _How is he doing this?_

 _It's like he must have done this before._

"Will you tell me something?" Ichigo asked, keeping his head rested on the noble's warm shoulder, "How do you know what to do right now? You seem to know just what to say. It's kinda like you're reading my mind. I'm glad because there are things I know that you know, but I can't make myself say them out loud right now. Where is that coming from?"

Byakuya's head turned slightly and his soft cheek touched Ichigo's as he answered.

"You are aware that my cousin, Tetsuya, was once a prisoner in an illegal noble's prison?"

"Yeah, I heard about it, although not many of the details. I know it messed him up pretty badly."

Byakuya nodded.

"When I first brought Tetsuya home to Kuchiki Manor, he had never been anywhere but in the prison before. He knew nothing of living in a home, how to dress and care for himself properly or how to conduct himself around others. The healers called him a feral child, and in truth, he was. I engaged our house attendants, Torio and Koji in calming and slowly educating Tetsuya. But nothing about that was easy. Tetsuya was terrified of all of us, even me, who had rescued him. The one person he trusted most was killed in the emancipation of the prison. Adding to that, Tetsuya had been repeatedly raped and beaten by pureblood relatives, who went on for years telling him that he was nothing, that his powers were stolen, that he deserved the pain he was in, that he did not deserve to live."

"Damn," Ichigo whispered sympathetically, "What did you do?"

"I sought help from Unohana Retsu in knowing how to help him. The elders tried to force me to send him to an asylum, but she argued on his behalf that he would only see this as being imprisoned again. I had Tetsuya's trust, so I needed to be a part of his healing and recovery. I listened to Unohana's advice and learned to comfort Tetsuya in this way."

Ichigo suddenly found himself smiling.

"No wonder you and Tetsuya are so close," he sighed, closing his eyes, "You're really good at this. If you'd asked me? I would've said that I didn't know what I needed. I just knew I needed something. But you know."

Ichigo paused and considered his next words carefully.

"I didn't know how to feel at first, knowing that you knew what that bastard did to me," he continued, "I didn't want anyone to know, but at the same time, I didn't want to be alone with it. Knowing you're aware, and that you understand helps a lot. And I'm grateful to you for being quiet about it."

"I would never betray your confidence," Byakuya promised, "This is a private matter. You should decide what to say and whom to tell. I could not help learning of it, so I will be discreet."

"Thank you," Ichigo said sincerely, "I feel like everything's out of control right now. It would just be one more thing if everyone knew, you know?"

"I understand. I will not reveal what I know to anyone, but I do hope that you will seek assistance for the post traumatic stress. I know that the last thing you want is to speak about what happened. Maybe now is not the time, but when you feel ready. No one should force you to seek that help. It must be because you feel ready to face your demons about what happened to you. While you work towards that point, I hope you will feel safe sharing your discomfort with me."

Ichigo let out a long, shaky breath that seemed to carry away the last of the tension.

"I feel like I could tell you anything," he breathed into Byakuya's shoulder.

"Rest now," Byakuya advised him, laying back down and bringing Ichigo closer to him, "Both of us have been injured recently."

"Yeah," Ichigo agreed, snuggling closer to him, "Thanks for protecting me, too."

"I am not pleased those quincies tried to attack you, but it is gratifying to be able to repay some of the debt I owe you."

"Heh, you don't owe me anything," Ichigo chuckled more lightly, smiling more widely as Byakuya's fingers slid through the short strands of his ginger hair, "I wanted to protect everyone."

"And you did. Now, please rest and heal. The battles are over and it is time for us to enjoy the peace we worked and suffered so much to earn."

"Yeah," Ichigo sighed sleepily, "okay."

He focused on the little caresses on his hair and skin, and breathed in Byakuya's pretty sakura scent, sinking slowly down into a calmer sleep, still rested against the noble's side.

XXXXXXXXXX

Kuri opened his eyes and frowned in disappointment in finding that Tetsuya had left his room. He sensed his mother and sister's healing power being used nearby and the presence of Kuchiki family attendants nearby. Tetsuya's gentle reiatsu radiated somewhere a short distance away, and Kuri sensed a sadness in the younger man's heart.

 _What is wrong, angelito?_

He sat up slowly and was pleased to note that much of the pain had drained out of his body. He slipped out of the bed and stood still for a moment, adjusting to being back on his feet for the first time. He wrapped a yukata around himself and put on a pair of warm slippers. Heading out into the gardens, he carefully avoided the eyes of the attendants. Following the little touches of Tetsuya's reiatsu, he headed out the back gate, and along a quiet pathway that ran past the barn where the spirit steeds were cared for, and ended at the quiet cemetery, where the Kuchiki family's departed relatives rested.

 _Ah, I see._

He followed the wisps of Tetsuya's reiatsu into the cemetery and to a quiet, shaded corner where Tetsuya knelt in front of a tall carved headstone, facing away from Kuri, with his head bowed and holding wildflowers in his hand.

"I am to be given to a clan leader in marriage," Tetsuya said softly, "But you don't need to worry. Kuri-kuri-sama's family is not like most of the clans. They have a large family and they love and protect each other as you and I did. Magdelina-sama is beautiful and wise. She already treats me as though I was born into the family. Aderia-san is sweet and kind…except when she is scolding her brother. They fight a lot, but there is so much love, they even fight lovingly. Kuri-kuri is a powerful man, but he has had his heart broken badly, as I have. While he has been recovering here, I have seen how he still cries in his sleep for his lost love. I feel that same heartbrokenness every day for you. It seems, Kuri-kuri can understand how that pain never goes away. But it feels less heavy when I am near him. Sharing that weight of grief with someone takes some of the pain away. I will never forget you and Kuri-kuri will never forget his Hideaki. But we enter this marriage knowing that each of us is not the other's lost one. We will build from the ashes of what was lost, but we will grow in new ways together. I feel in my heart that this is what you would want for me, and this gives me the courage to move forward and take his hand willingly. To do this, of course, means giving up my place as Byakuya-sama's bodyguard and healer, but maybe…maybe I will, with my new family, be able to become just a healer as I have always wanted to do. I know Byakuya-sama was right to help me become able to fight. I had to be strong to protect my freedom, but…"

Tetsuya blinked and sucked in a surprised breath as Kuri's hand touched his shoulder gently.

" _Ay perdòn_ ," the Shima leader apologized, "I am sorry to bother you, Tetsu-hana, but your words were so beautiful and hopeful, I am touched."

Tetsuya blushed brightly.

"You should be in bed, Kuri-kuri-sama," he said self-consciously, "not out here, listening to other people's conversations."

"I am a cad," Kuri agreed, giving Tetsuya a little smirk, "My apologies for offending you."

"I hope I did not offend you," Tetsuya replied, looking up into his fiancé's handsome turquoise eyes, "speaking so boldly."

"Eh, it is better that we should always be honest with each other. And you are right. Although you and I will always love the ones we lost, we can make our own happiness. We must first learn about each other. And I think that you just took a large step, telling me about your wish to become a healer."

Tetsuya's blush darkened.

"I didn't exactly _tell_ you," he exclaimed softly, "You were snooping."

"I said I was sorry."

"You don't look terribly sorry," Tetsuya accused him gently, "In fact, you look pleased with yourself."

Kuri smiled so warmly, Tetsuya felt his momentary anger fade swiftly.

"I am not pleased with myself for snooping," he explained, "I am pleased because I know something that means a lot to my Tetsu-hana. And because I know, I will help you."

Tetsuya looked back at him speechlessly for a moment and Kuri curved a warm palm around his cheek.

"You have spent years perfecting your ability to give proper responses and to conduct yourself like your pureblood brothers," Kuri said quietly, "but I feel your more spirited self beneath the surface, Tetsu-hana. You chafe at their rules and restrictions. You love Byakurai, but you love your freedom even more…so much that you sometimes barely contain yourself."

Tetsuya gave him a mystified look.

"How do you…?" he began.

"A rebel knows a rebel, even when he tries to hide himself," Kuri chuckled, "You may act as you are supposed to while others are looking, but I know for a fact that you find ways to be yourself."

Tetsuya's expression turned curious.

"You don't look as though you disapprove."

"Not at all," Kuri assured him, "And you can be sure that _Mamà_ and Deripie will spoil the living hell out of you, letting you run wild. They know how you have suffered. Like me, they want to see you deliriously happy."

"Why does my happiness mean so much to you?" Tetsuya asked, frowning, "You barely know me."

"You did not know me, but you saved my life."

"Anyone would have…"

"No, not anyone, Tetsu-hana. And even if they would have, they were not there with me in my time of need. You were there, and you kept me alive. I am very glad not to have died, and I want to repay your kindness."

Tetsuya's lips tightened against the smile that tried to overtake them.

"You can repay my kindness by not undoing the hard work I did, saving your life," he said sternly, "Let me take you back to rest, Kuri-kuri-sama."

Kuri rolled his eyes and snickered, but allowed Tetsuya to wrap a supportive arm around him.

"We are not yet married and already my Tetsu-hana is lovingly nagging," he laughed affectionately, "Very well. I see there is no arguing with you, eh?"

"Not about this," Tetsuya insisted, "Please come back with me now."

"But you've forgotten to give those flowers to your late husband," Kuri objected, snatching the wildflowers from Tetsuya's other hand and turning back to Naoki's grave.

He bent forward and laid the flowers gently on the grass in front of the headstone.

"Naoki," he said in a suddenly solemn tone, "I thank you for taking good care of Tetsu-hana while you were both imprisoned. And I promise you that I will do my best to protect him and to make him happy as you would have. Please rest peacefully, knowing that I will let no harm come to him and I will treasure him."

He heard a soft sniff behind him and looked over his shoulder to find that Tetsuya's blue eyes had filled with tears. He took Tetsuya's hand in his, rubbing the younger man's slender fingers comfortingly.

"What is it, Tetsu-hana? Did I say something wrong?"

"No," Tetsuya assured him, "it wasn't that at all. It's just that only Byakuya-sama ever spoke so respectfully to Naoki. Even after he gave his life to save mine, the elders disapproved of Byakuya-sama declaring us spouses and allowing Naoki to be buried with the main family."

"A bunch of fools," Kuri said off-handedly, "But like you, I do not like being told what to do. You don't need to worry about that anymore. We will defy anyone who disrespects the ones we have loved."

Tetsuya found a little smile returning to his lips.

"I don't know anyone like you, Kuri-kuri-sama," he sighed, accepting the Shima leader's embrace and a chaste kiss on his flushed lips.

"What can I say?" Kuri said warmly, "Like you, I am one of a kind. _Mi hermana_ would say thank goodness for that!"

"Come back with me, please," Tetsuya insisted, tugging on his arm, "You're going to have everyone looking for you."

"All right, all right," Kuri chuckled, accepting Tetsuya's arm around him again, "but do you promise to stay and talk to me more, Tetsu-hana?"

"As long as you promise to rest," Tetsuya said firmly.

"Then, I guess I am resting," Kuri laughed, leaning against Tetsuya as the two returned to the main house together.

XXXXXXXXXX

Byakuya laid quietly against the pillows, holding Ichigo against him and humming softly as he gazed out the window at the starry, moonless sky.

 _It is good that he is finally resting comfortably. I know that this is only the beginning of his recovery, but it will help him build up his strength. Something like this is not easily dismissed. He will need to face his emotions about being sexually assaulted, but right now, the wounds are too fresh. Right now, we can only focus on healing the physical hurts and helping him feel at home again. The wounds on his body will heal, but we must hope that somehow his heart too will be healed._

 _Whatever it takes, I will see that done._

 _I owe him that._


End file.
